


Days of Burning Dreams

by rubylily



Category: Loveless
Genre: Canon Lesbian Relationship, F/F, Romance, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-30
Updated: 2012-11-30
Packaged: 2017-11-19 21:30:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/577859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rubylily/pseuds/rubylily
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yamato and Kouya are still adjusting to life after leaving Nagisa, and while staying with a compassionate old woman, they reflect on what the future could hold for them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Days of Burning Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> Written for veleda_k as part of the Femslash Multifandom Ficathon 2012 on LiveJournal and Dreamwidth.

Yamato stared out the window, with her elbow on the sill and her chin in her hand. Dawn was quickly approaching, and already that woman, Yoshiya Yumeko, was sitting outside. For a month Yamato and Kouya had been staying with her, and since this house was out in the middle of the practically nowhere, it suited them well for now.

It had already been half a year since they had left Sagan Nagisa and Seven Voices Academy. They had left all their belongings behind and started with little money to their names, but by taking odd jobs here and there and staying at cheap hotels they managed to get by. This was the longest they had stayed in one place, and neither of them could be sure whether or not Nagisa was still searching for them, if she ever had been in the first place.

Yamato stretched her arms. All she really knew about this Yoshiya woman was that she was a former novelist and that she still had her "ears," but she didn't try to pry into Yamato's and Kouya's business, so that was a plus in her favor, at least.

"Yamato, you're already awake?" asked a voice behind Yamato, and she turned to face the speaker, Kouya, who was still dressed in the tank-top and shorts she had fallen asleep in. Yamato had already gotten dressed.

"I didn't sleep well last night," Yamato answered, although she still smiled. "Want to put the futon away now or later?"

Kouya's glasses still lay upon the dresser, so she went over to retrieve them and put them on. Yoshiya had told the two of them the dresser was theirs to use, but they owned precious few changes of clothing, so they still kept most of them in their travel bags. "In a minute, after I've gotten dressed," Kouya said as she bent over one of their bags to dig out an outfit.

Yamato laughed. "If you say so. But don't feel rushed or anything, I'm pretty sure Yoshiya-san will make our breakfast whenever we ask."

The house was a traditional one, and fairly large, but as far as either Yamato or Kouya knew, Yoshiya had lived here alone. Even their temporary bedroom was rather large for just the two of them. Yamato wasn't about to ask why, but she did at times find the openness of this home to be rather suffocating.

Her back to Yamato, Kouya shrugged off her sleepwear and then put on her usual kind of outfit - a white button-up shirt and a pelted skirt; it looked similar enough to her former school uniform. "I think we should leave soon," she said, finishing up on the last button on her top. "We've imposed too long on Yoshiya-san."

"She doesn't seem to mind, and it is nice is not have to worry about where our next meal's coming from, but yeah, I'd rather be able to rely on ourselves," Yamato added. "Didn't realize how hard it was to save money…"

Kouya walked over to Yamato's side and stared out the window. "Perhaps we should ask Yoshiya-san for advice," she suggested, and it hard to tell if she was being sarcastic or not. "She seemed to have amassed quite the wealth for herself."

Yamato wrapped her arm around Kouya's waist, pulling her close, and then kissed her cheek. "Maybe her novels just sold that well," Yamato joked.

"I've never heard of her, though…" Kouya said, and before giving Yamato a chance to reply, she grabbed Yamato's hand and pulled her toward the futon, and she didn't resist, just simply smiled. Together they carefully rolled up the futon and put it away, and then they left this sparse, suffocating room, still holding each other's hand.

Yamato's fingers tightened around Kouya's. Lately she had been dreaming of empty, open spaces, where nothingness surrounded her and Kouya. She had not told Kouya about them yet; even in dreams she was happy to be with her love, but it was nothingness that bothered her. If it was her subconscious trying to tell her something, it wasn't trying to be subtle at all, and to be quite honest, it was beginning to annoy her.

Kouya looked down at Yamato's fingers squeezing hers. "Yamato, is something wrong?" she asked, just a hint of concern in her tone.

Yamato just laughed. "Nothing but general worry," she answered with a wide smile. "I've just been a worrywart lately, you know."

Kouya was silent, only giving Yamato's hand a little squeeze of her own. For Yamato that was comfort enough.

Soon they reached the kitchen, and when they entered Yamato could not hide her surprise when she saw Yoshiya standing in front of the stove, holding a pan in her hand.

Yoshiya was an old woman, probably in her seventies, and the fur of her ears was as gray as the rest of her long, curly hair. She was a little shorter than the two girls, and she wore a simple blue dress with a black scarf wrapped loosely around her shoulders. She smiled when she turned to face Yamato and Kouya. "Good morning, you two," she greeted in a soft voice.

"Good morning, Yoshiya-san," Kouya replied with a nod, her expression stoic.

Yamato's reply was more blunt. "I thought you were outside!"

Yoshiya chuckled. "Oh, did you see me? Well, I decided to get a little fresh air before I cooked breakfast. It seems my timing was quite fortunate, if I do say so myself."

"What are you cooking?" Kouya asked, stepping closer to Yoshiya, and Yamato followed.

"Eggs," Yoshiya answered, moving to the side so that Yamato and Kouya could see eggs cooking sunny-side up in the frying pan. "I decided on something simple for this morning."

Yamato grinned broadly, but even she wasn't sure if it was entirely sincere. This woman could be too kind at times… "Thanks, Yoshiya-san," she said, and Kouya merely nodded.

Breakfast was relatively uneventful. Yoshiya had seemed surprised that neither them of them had work, but both of them had the day off. Yamato and Kouya currently worked at a nearby library, and the pay was decent. There were few job opportunities available for them, and considering what had happened the first time they had taken jobs as waitresses, they had decided against most kinds of service jobs.

While they ate, Kouya had waited until Yamato had begun to eat the hot eggs before she started to bite into her own meal. Yoshiya had seemed puzzled by that, but she had not said anything, and that came as a relief to Yamato.

After breakfast, Yamato and Kouya had decided to spend some time in the garden behind the house. The one downside of not working was that otherwise there wasn't much else to do, and neither felt much like reading right now. Yoshiya didn't even have a television or an Internet connection, but such luxuries were barely missed.

The two of sat on a wooden bench near the front of the garden, and Kouya rested her head on Yamato's shoulder. Much to Yamato's surprise, there was no koi pond to complete the traditional image.

Kouya's fingers curled around Yamato's. "I think we really should leave tomorrow, Yamato," she said.

Yamato leaned her head back. "Yeah, I agree," she replied. "Maybe as a going-away present we should clean each and every room in this house."

A faint smile came upon Kouya's lips. "You know she treats us too much like guests to let us do any work."

Yamato could only laugh in response. "So, have any idea where we should stay next?" she asked, raising a hand to gently brush a few strands of dark hair from Kouya's forehead.

"There are some cheap apartments near the library," Kouya answered, her fingers tightening around Yamato's. "We have enough money saved up to afford the rent for a few months, and we won't have to leave this job right away."

"I have to say, this library job is probably the nicest job we've had in a while," Yamato agreed. "But we'll have to leave eventually. Who knows if Nagisa-sensei is still looking for us…"

Kouya's body stiffed, and she bit her lower lip. It was a habit she was trying to break. "We can't take any chances," she said in a low voice.

Yamato said nothing in reply; what else could she say to that? As much as she was loath to admit it, she did agree with that. Instead, she cupped Kouya's chin with her free hand and then leaned in for a…

"Oh, so this is where you two are!"

Yamato quickly pushed herself away from Kouya, and then the two of them turned her heads and saw Yoshiya standing behind them. Yamato cursed herself silently; it was not like her to be so easily embarrassed.

"Hello, Yoshiya-san," Kouya greeted in a neutral voice, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose, and sunlight gleamed on the lenses.

Yoshiya let out a gentle chuckle. "You needn't be so formal," she replied, a small smile on her wrinkled face. "I wasn't interrupting anything, was I?"

"Not as all!" Yamato said with fake cheer as she stood up. "In fact, we were just about to go take a bath!"

Yoshiya seemed stunned for a moment, and she didn't reply immediately. "O-Oh, well, there are fresh towels near the bathroom," she told Yamato, unable to hide the confusion in her voice, and her smile was rather awkward. "Feel free to help yourself to them."

Yamato grinned widely. "Thank you! Come on, Kouya!"

Kouya said nothing; she simply nodded, stood up, and then followed Yamato. The two young women went back into the house, leaving the old woman by herself.

Now that Yamato thought about it, suddenly exclaiming she wanted to take a bath with Kouya was probably more obvious than just cuddling and kissing her, but it was often considered normal for two girls to bathe together, so maybe they could still continue to hide in plain sight for just a little while longer.

But one day, she thought, it would be nice if they no longer had to feel the need to be secretive about their relationship.

* * *

For Yamato and Kouya, baths were a luxury; usually they barely had enough time or water for a shower, let alone a bath, so the one way they took advantage of Yoshiya's hospitality was to take warm bubble baths as often as possible.

They both stood naked in the bathroom, and once the tub was filled, Yamato dipped her arm into the water to check the temperature, and then she got into the tub. "Okay Kouya, you can get in now," she said. "The water's fine."

Kouya took off her glasses and set them down next to the sink, and then she also climbed into the filled tub, on the opposite side of Yamato. It was a small tub, and her knees bumped against Yamato's.

Yamato lightly swatted at some of the bubbles, and she let out a quiet laugh. "So how is it?" she asked, rubbing her knee against Kouya's leg.

Kouya's expression reminded stoic, although were the hints of a faint blush on her cheeks. "It's fine," was her only reply.

Even through the steam and bubbles Yamato could still see the "zero" mark on Kouya's breast. It had faded slightly, and some of her sense of pain had returned, but still not enough for her to be able to safely judge temperatures for herself.

Even after all this time, neither of them knew what had triggered the loss of Yamato's "name" and the return of her sense of pain. It no longer bothered Yamato to be different from Kouya, as they now had a stronger bond than ever before, but the uncertainty of the initial situation still nagged at her.

Finally Kouya broke the silence that had fallen between them. "Is something bothering you?" she asked, intently staring at Yamato's face.

Yamato shook her head. "I was just thinking about how all this started," she answered, and then she pulled herself closer to Kouya. "And where we could be going…" Her voice was barely more than a whisper, and she cupped Kouya's face and then kissed her deeply. Kouya's lips were so warm, so soft, something she had always been aware of. "That was to make up for earlier," she added in a heated voice once she broke the kiss.

Kouya smiled, the same faint smile Yamato loved so much. "I never thought you cared much what others thought of us," she replied, her voice just as low and heated.

"Heh, even I can be cautious sometimes," Yamato laughed. "Still, if we're leaving tomorrow, there's really no need to worry about what Yoshiya-san thinks anymore." However, she did often wonder if Yoshiya had already figured out their relationship; two women barely eighteen seemingly glued at the hip and without their "ears"? Maybe they weren't being particularly subtle, but so far it had caused them few problems. Yamato only hoped things remained that way.

_"I'll always protect you."_ Kouya had said those words to her on the night of their rebirth, and that promise could still light a fire within her heart.

She could only laugh silently at herself. When had she become so optimistic?

"If you say so," Kouya said, and then she wrapped her arms around Yamato, pulling her close for another kiss, this one eager and hungry. Yamato parted her lips for Kouya's tongue, and she felt Kouya's small breasts press against hers as she returned the tight embrace. They were splashing water everywhere, but as she savored the feel of Kouya's naked body, Yamato found she really didn't care.

On the eve of their rebirth, they had promised they would always care for each other, after all.

* * *

When night finally fell, Yamato couldn't sleep. Lying next to her lover, she had listened to Kouya's slow and deep breathing, but for some reason she could not fall asleep as easily. So, being careful not to wake Kouya, she had climbed out of the futon and left the bedroom to wander the halls.

Just as she had at dawn, she now stared out of a window, resting her elbows on the sill. There were no clouds, and it was a night of a new moon, so the stars were clearly visible. How many cold and warm nights had she and Kouya slept under these same stars? Always moving from one place to another, not always able to obtain basic necessities; that was the life they lived. She could bear it because she always had Kouya, but she wanted a better life for the both of them.

Their new bond was constantly being tested. But it was strong enough to endure this new life, she told herself.

"So you are still awake, Nakano-san," said a female voice next to Yamato; Yoshiya stood next to her, dressed in a white nightgown with a shawl wrapped around her shoulders. "I thought I had heard something."

Yamato briefly wondered why she never seemed to hear Yoshiya coming. "I didn't mean to wake you, Yoshiya-san," she apologized.

"Ah, I wasn't asleep yet," Yoshiya replied, a gentle smile on her lips. "I was actually inspired to do a little bit of writing for the first time in a long while."

Yamato didn't reply just yet; she just turned her head to properly met Yoshiya's gaze, and she could not read the older woman's expression.

There was a faraway look in Yoshiya's dark eyes. "I knew a girl like you once," she began to say. "She was a little like Sakagami-san too. We used to be very close, but one day she just left. I didn't know where she had gone, so I thought I could catch her attention by publishing novels, especially if…" She trailed off, although Yamato could guess at what she was trying to say.

Yamato tried to keep her expression neutral. "Did you ever see her again?" she asked.

Yoshiya raised a hand to touch one of her fur-covered ears. "No, I haven't found her yet," was her only answer, and her voice was so quiet it could barely even be considered a whisper.

"Hm…" Yamato turned her face away, once again staring outside at the stars that dotted the night sky. "Kouya and I plan on living tomorrow." She had not intended to tell Yoshiya that, but now she felt that she couldn't leave without saying a word.

Yoshiya let out a quiet chuckle. "Why am I not surprised?" she said. "It is sad to see you go, and if you need to, you can always come back here. But with the love you two share, I'm sure you will be fine."

Yamato could not help but smile. "Thank you, Yoshiya-san," was all she was able to say.

"Well then, goodnight and farewell, Nakano-san. Be sure to say farewell to Sakagami-san for me." Yoshiya bowed, and then she walked away, leaving Yamato alone in the darkness.

"Yeah, goodbye…" Yamato whispered, waiting until Yoshiya was out of the sight. She returned to her bedroom and carefully lay down next to Kouya without disturbing her, and throughout the night she found herself holding her lover more tightly than usual. Kouya's presence helped calm her, and soon she felt Kouya's arms around her as well.

As soon as dawn arrived, Yamato and Kouya were ready to leave, and for once they were awake before Yoshiya was. Near the entrance they found a bag filled with a few blankets, changes of clothes, and two novels, with a note from Yoshiya wishing them luck. Both of them had decided they would stop at a café for breakfast, so less than an hour after they had awoken, they had left Yoshiya's home.

The weather was a little overcast, but not too chilly, and as they walked Yamato's fingers were intertwined with Kouya's. Yoshiya's home had been rather out-of-the-way, so they walked along a tree-lined stone path. The only sounds keeping them company were the winds and birds; it seemed no one else lived around here.

"Are you sure you're fine with this?" Kouya asked, breaking the silence that had formed between them.

"Yeah, it's like we discussed, we should try to be more self-sufficient," Yamato answered with a smile, and the smile felt natural for once. "And besides, if we do run into some trouble, Yoshiya-san said we can always come visit her."

Kouya sighed, and then a soft smile came upon her lips. "She is much too kind. But I did appreciate that kindness."

Yamato simply laughed. Neither she nor Kouya really knew where they were going right now, but no matter the path they followed, there was always a future waiting ahead for them. She pulled Kouya closer for a kiss, and Kouya wrapped her arms tightly around Yamato, deepening the kiss.

The two of them still dreamed of brighter days. They had each other, and the love they shared would guide them to their own future.


End file.
